OK - I broke through a new barrier today. Kendall, Kyle and I all went on the trail. I was on Gemini and ponying Zarah. Kyle was on Rain in an English saddle (pretty damn cute). He was wearing his slippers and tight teen jeans with a winter hat on his head. Kendall was complaining a little because she didn't want to be ponied, but I just don't know if I trust Z with a kid on her back. And Gemini hasn't been on the trail in a long time, so I was worried he might start bucking any time.
I actually got off and walked part of the ride. I had a buzz in my stomach and I wanted to be sure we went out and came back safe. I wasn't worried about Kyle so much because I trust Rain so much. She's just a sensible, honest and willing horse. Zarah I trust implicitly when I'm the one riding her. Honestly, I let Marcy ride Zarah once for about a mile on the trail when I was trying to help her with her horse, Holly. I think Jen rode Z once for about 10 mins at a trail head. Otherwise, it's ALWAYS me. So, I don't know if I trust her with Kendall or not.
Anyway, Gemini did fine and today was the first time that I sent him out on the circle with a saddle cinched tight and he didn't buck. I was so pleasantly surprised. Once we headed out I realized I had a buzz in my stomach. That was when I decided that I couldn't be a good leader with that buzz in my stomach and I hopped off and lead Z and Gemini for a mile or so until the buzz went away. It was the right thing to do and I'm proud of myself!
It was a good ride, with no incidents and I got off and on Gemini several times. I have to learn to trust him. It will take time.